Da End (maybe??)

Well, I am beyond the date I had plans for!! "What are you doing after the retreat center?" was the question I got asked over the summer. "My life plans end on Sept 2," was the answer. And here we are, Sept 3!

On Aug 26th, my buddy Jen, who I've known for around 20 years, met me at Waterloo Station and we jumped on the Eurostar to Paris to attend our friend Laura's wedding in Paris. Our hotel room got named "the infirmary" as Jen was swigging back kaolin and morphine following food poisining from her summer travels and an hour after I delivered my wedding speech, i lost my voice and was Ms. Voiceless for the rest of the fabulous celebrations. Amazing fireworks at midnight, a mountain of profiteroles in the shape of the arc de triomphe and blue, blue sky.

Then yesterday was the event that officially closed my summer - my brother and Suze's engagement party in the back garden with about 90 people! The clouds were kind to us and did not drop water and I never want to see a cream cake again!! It was strange to see my brother's primary and high school friends with their broods of little ones.

I've been temping since Weds and my suitcases are all officially unpacked. My feet are itchy. This is the longest period of time I've been home (chez parents) since early 2003!

I feel rested and ready for the next adventure - the next chapter. To where? And with whom??? Time to start planning samz autumn.

Thanks for reading my blog and keeping up with me over my summer trails!

I am totally open to hearing about cool projects/ organisations/ experiences overseas to immerse myself in - especially in the U S of A.

Lots of love to everyone out there !!!!

Blast!!!

Yesterday, I ended up riding in a convertible down beautiful country roads - whey!hey! - to do a thrift store run with 3 others who are going to Burning Man (a week long "happening" in the Nevada desert where people - apparently - wear garish clothes!!!) We hit three thrift stores in 3 hours and I got some great things - four items for 7 pounds. The two guys had me laughing like crazy as they bought loads of women's clothing for a camp/ crazy/ clubby look - there's something about hairy chests and stretchy lycra pink tops that is so outrageous! They purchased the craziest things - a tea cosy for a hat - fur coats (for chilly desert nights) and were equally delighted with their bargains. The assistants in the charity stores also got a great kick out of these two straight, normal looking guys trying on these FAB-u-LOUS girly outfits!!

update!

I have a minor case of the summer sniffles - first cold I've had in eons and it appears to be a light one. My room-mate (also a massage therapist) woke up the other morning and asked how I'd feel about doing her 2-hour golf cart shift in exchange for a full-body massage. It was an absolute "yes'! And at 10am after we waved the last of the seniors off, I had the most gorgeous massage in an outdoor gazebo right next to the lake - it was like something out of an advert for a ritzy health farm!!
I've spent the last hour or two napping in the sunshine and feel superb (despite lots of scrunched up tissues being in my bag, my pockets, my sleeves!)
The building is now senior free and the furniture is being shuffled around as we return to spiritual retreat ctr status for tomorrow and the arrival of 120 guests who are coming to immerse themselves in an array of things ranging from environmentalism to shamanic healing to chant-leading to davenning to priestess training. So, it feels like my curriculum on seniors and ageing is coming to a stop for now and there are new subjects to learn in the university of life.
We had a round table discussion with our seniors (mostly in their 80s and 90s!) on "being a survivor". There were a lot of Holocaust survivors here, as well as people who had survived other things such as loss of a spouse, serious illness and so forth. Here is some of their life wisdom on dealing with adversity.
"Be curious and always look ahead. If you want a survivor outlook, don't look back!"
"There's no power in saying 'I'm unlucky' - just say it happened"
"Stay open to trust, eve if it hurt once to be open"
The seniors in this last trip had a great spirit and were a joy to work with - they were also incredibly well and healthy - many of them appeared 20-30 years younger than they really were. It seems that most of them swear by walking lots and swimming everyday, when i asked them what their secret is!!
Can't remember if I mentioned it, but I bought in on a co-owned staff car - which means that for $50 per month I get to share it with 4 others - wish I'd known about this possibility earlier!!! I am so loving the freedom it brings and the chance to explore!!!!

Inspired by exercise!

On Fri morning I had a treat! A 90 min exercise session led by Ari, who is the director of the centre. In his past life (ie - up until a year ago) he had his own personal training business. My co-worker told me that Ari would never say this to us (as he's too modest) but he was trainer to Jennifer Lopez and other A-List celebs. So, what a privilege to have him teach us !! I believe various mags also voted him as trainer of the year etc. It was, of course, a five star class!

Yesterday, I went to Jacob's Pillow, which is a dance centre - they had a community day with all sorts of great free performances - my fave was going into the dance school and observing the class doing their morning warm up. It was like a scene from The Kids From Fame. It sure made me want to move my body!!

Since waking up at 6.30am, I've been thinking exercise, exercise, exercise - so I'm about to head off on a long walk!! I joined the old ladies for 15 mins doing chair exercises, but that didn't do it for me!!

Last week, a somatic educator came in and gave a class which was also fascinating. Her tip for aging gracefully and healthily was "keep moving!"

So, movement and exercising is a definite theme right now!! I need something to balance 34 sedentary hours coming up this week of sitting in a golf cart!

Once we switch back into retreat ctr mode, next week, there will be two yoga classes per day. I hope I like the teacher!!! We also have a visiting teacher coming this week (Jodi) who is a dancer and yoga teacher and I'm totally looking forward to her class tmw!!

Angry

There are some advantages to being in the woods, 3,000 miles or so away from my home city. I had an e-mail last week that reminded me of an incident I'd conveniently forgotten - a really bad experience with the film crew from a TV talk show. the e-mail said that the footage was being aired this week. Big, fat, sinking feeling. Relief at being far away. Forever the optimist, hoping it wasn't going to be as awful as I anticipated. Call home to parents today. They didn't see it either. Apparently, their friends did and two of them were so disgusted they walked out of the room. I hate to think what the editing process did and what the angle/ narration was. I feel bad for the other people on film who were exploited (most probably) and ridiculed by the camera.
Lessons learnt - no longer trust the integrity of journalists. This upsets me having been a media person myself.
Lesson two: do not let the media interfere with my life. I think I was too media-friendly previously and too helpful - I actually arranged my schedule around journos/ film crews who wanted to come.
Lesson three: do not be hypnotised by the glamour of celebrity or media. There were more letdowns than moments of "yay!!" with media promises.
Lesson four: remember the good! Do not let this idiot TV show dissuade me from pursuing things in life which I know to be good and true. Carry on protecting myself and my guests. refuse to be a media circus. It's all good life experience. How many people can say that they have appeared on a trashy TV show in their life and come away feeling more strongly than ever that human dignity is something to be honoured and preserved? End of rant. PS - as my mother likes to dramatise stories - it may not be quite as awful as I'm hearing.

Persistence

There are two ladies here I take my hat off to. Interestingly, they are both 90, both hard of hearing and both very stubborn! The senior camp here has been sold out for ages with a huge waiting list. These two ladies both did not want to go home after their two week session ended. They enquired about lengthening their stay, got a "no" and would not take no for an answer!! They told everyone they saw every day about how much they wanted to stay. One lady even paid me for next week's massage as she was so determined she was going to be here. And, guess what, both of them are able to stay on despite the humungous waiting lists. Proof of the pudding that when there is a will there is a way!! I loved seeing their determination in action and am so delighted for them both.
I got a cute e-mail animation some months back (I think from Shlomit) about a bunch of frogs that wanted to climb to the top of the mountain - everyone said that frogs couldn't climb so high. One by one the frogs indeed got tired and toppled off. But, there was one hardy frog that hopped all the way to the top. WHat made this frog different from the others? Turned out, he was deaf so immune to the voices of "no" around him. I wonder if these two ladies' lack of hearing proved an asset as their inner voice of "I want this!" was more audible to them than the voices of no-can-do around them.

Camp Kvetch

This bunch of campers are hard work. There are almost 100 of them and as a group they are very high maintenance - there are people being hospitalised left, right and centre - there are many people with mobility issues who are very dependant on us for lots of little things (which would be well and good if there were enough staff) and I get a negative energy from the group. Complaining seems to be a hobby for some of them! One guy asked me how an inter-generational activity went - I told him how nice it was. His response was "Pah - that's not a real activity if it was harmonious." He then proceeded to tell me that the chef should not make public appearances in the kitchen because she is a) overweight and b) a lesbian. At that point, I found him too offensive to be around and disappeared. I've had 3 campers being verbally abusive to me - 2 of them had the decency to apologise afterwards.
I wonder whether the dynamics between group 1 and group 2 of seniors is so different because that's just who they are - or whether people are feeling lost among the larger numbers and that is bringing out the antagonistic sides to their nature. Tomorrow night the director is hosting a "how is it going?" night for the staff. I sense there will be some burnt out and angry people there. Venting a little in this e-mail has softened my edges.